California is experiencing a drought. Other states have massive flooding and plenty of water but this heathen and overcrowded paradise is as dry as a bone. Our grass is brown, and there is more chardonnay than H2O around these parts. And we have been in the drought so long I am noticing that we have become rain cynics. Even when the heavens open and sprinkles dampen the ground, we doubt it will make a dent in our problem… we won’t find a fix until we drain Oregon (and trust me, we will.)
Today we had some brief thunderstorms in San Diego County. Lightening, Thunder and strong rain. I was transported back to the Midwest on a muggy summer night… The rain was so heavy that cars were pulling to the side of the road for safety and people were running for cover into building rather than get drenched. As the rain poured down, two guys sitting near me mentioned that “it won’t make a difference.” This rain, however torrential, will not end our drought. And they are right, but right in a hopeless sort of way. As the words left their mouths I realized the cynicism was an analogy of my cynicism when it comes to the things of faith, and maybe it is for you.
We hear a good word, we read promises in Scripture and we intellectually know that the grace of Christ is enough; enough for our salvation, enough for our transformation and enough to bring us home to heaven for eternity. But we don’t live in our intellect like we should. While we claim these truths as ours, we don’t live like they have owned us. A move of grace might be good, even drenching, but it won’t make a difference in the long run. I am too far off. I have broken too many rules. I don’t have worth enough to be saved and used. This is us doubting the “it is finished” of Jesus on the cross.
And here is the good news: he knows this about us and he is still enough. He still makes all the difference in the world and actually nothing can separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus. Jesus knows we are the whore, running after every new shiny thing and away from him and his promise stays the same. Just as he declared through Hosea, he will heal the waywardness and love of his people and restore us to himself. Forever.
This is good news. You don’t have to beat yourself up over the struggle you are having with doubt. Yo don’t have to live in discouragement. You can know that the grace of Christ is enough, even when you don’t think it is.
Sure, the rain we had today won’t dent the drought, but the grace of Christ you have been given today will more than make a difference. Rest in that. Drink it in.