If I am learning one thing as a pastor (or director, or whatever it is I am) it is that I am more broken than I once thought and even more reliant on God’s grace to carry out my mission here. I can try to minister in my own ability but it becomes a sham and no one will be inclined to follow my savior when it is forced. As I realize this more and more I long for growth in Christ more than anything.
I want to be daily astounded by what I receive. I want the gospel to be my defining truth and treasure. I want my sermons to come from the overflow of what the Holy Spirit is doing in my heart. I want to own my brokenness and in a greater way surrender to Christ’s ownership of me. I want the young adults around me to see Christ, not me.
Lord you are breaking me. I need more of you. I surrender to you. Move here. Use me as you will as I am faithful to you. Bring a gospel quake to this place and let the world see you through the way we live and strive to give you glory. Some days I don’t grow as fast as I wish, but in you I am new and have something new to say.
Very insiteful post…..sounds a lot like what is going on here as we are going through the LIVE DEAD challenge. We are “re-doing” it in Feb as a choice and it has been wonderful to see humility in the body of Christ. The daily prayer meetings are growing, there have been some astounding healings – none of which have been in the corporate meetings but at home while the people are seeking God in the quiet place. The testimonies are rich. God is refining His Church.
I join you today in your profound and humble prayer.